Archive for category Daily Life
Gaining Control
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life on February 28, 2011
It started when someone (it truly doesn’t matter who, we’ve all done it) forgot to put the lock back on the bathroom closet. While my wife and I were eating dinner, Clay was upstairs quietly dumping witch hazel, mouthwash and shampoo on the bathroom floor, creating an inch-thick, three-foot-wide slippery soup. We cleaned it up as best we could (although two days later the bathroom still smelled minty fresh), and went back to eating.
It continued with Clay taking his pajamas off every 5-10 minutes for the next hour or so. (An odd compulsion we’ve been battling lately.)
And it culminated when I found him pajama-less, spinning on the floor in our bedroom. The little guy has been home too much with the cold and snowy weather. He’s bored. We understand. We all have cabin fever at this point. Fuses are short. Read the rest of this entry »
Tight Spaces
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life, Silly Behaviors on February 22, 2011
One night about a week ago, Clay disappeared on me.
With my wife at a meeting, it was just us guys for the evening. I was attempting to work in my office in the finished attic—while our basset hound, Miles, nudged against my leg demanding to be petted—when the silence below forced my nose out of my laptop.
No one would ever refer to Clay as a quiet little bunny. He maintains a steady stream of talking, mixed with squeaks and squawks, pretty much from dawn to midnight. When we go food shopping, I always know where Clay and my wife are, even from three aisles away. As I am typing this I can hear him downstairs watching Shrek in his room, screeching and clapping. A ghostly quiet grabs your attention.
Downstairs I went, checking the little guy’s usual haunts—his room, the upstairs bathroom, our bedroom, the room above the kitchen where we set up a computer so he can listen to his favorite music. (The last few weeks he’s played a steady stream of Andrea Bocelli’s Romanza, Willie Nelson’s 16 Biggest Hits and Johnny Cash’s The Man Comes Around.) No sign of Clay. I headed down to the living room, family room and kitchen. Still no sweet sound of babble. Read the rest of this entry »
Sitter Search
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life on February 11, 2011
The woman who has been sitting with Clay four afternoons a week gave her notice this week, sending us scrambling for a replacement.
Clay is in high school, so gets home by 2:30 most days, leaving a long afternoon ahead. The little guy needs some down time, a chance to “decompress” from school. But we also want his afternoons to be productive, filled with activities, typing, reading, homework and a minimum of “stimming” (rolling on the floor, jumping on the bed, etc.)
So, we have two weeks to find a new sitter with the right personality, experience with autism and, preferably, a background in special education. I had to double-check my math, but this will be our sixth sitter in a little more than a year and a half. That’s a lot of change. (I don’t think it’s me, but to be safe, I’m vowing to begin showering at least twice a week going forward.) Read the rest of this entry »
Super Sunday
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life on February 7, 2011
The sun was shining Sunday afternoon and the thermometer read a balmy 40 degrees. A good day to stretch our legs at a nearby state park before the next storm hits in what feels like an endless winter. Clay, my wife, our basset hound Miles and I piled in the car with visions of clear trails running along the snow covered forest. Deer lapping quietly at the edge of the icy creek. Canada geese honking and splashing.
Turns out we weren’t the only ones with those visions. Read the rest of this entry »
The Gift
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life, Silly Behaviors on February 1, 2011
As soon as I saw the return address on the package I had a pretty good idea what was inside.
The package, from a good friend in Colorado, was addressed to both of us, so I left it on the counter with the other mail for my wife to open.
What did I think it was? I mentioned in a blog post around Christmas that Clay had broken a couple of ornaments, including a fragile Grinch globe that we had been hanging on our tree for 20 years. I know our friend in Colorado is a huge fan of Dr. Seuss, like Clay, and an avid reader of this blog. Putting two and two together, I figured it was a replacement ornament.
It turned out to be a much more generous gesture. Read the rest of this entry »
The Journey
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Daily Life, Silly Behaviors on January 28, 2011
The following is based on a true story.
It’s three in the afternoon on a Saturday. I’m in the family room watching a movie, just getting that wonderful fuzzy feeling of drifting off to a nap, when I hear a muffled bang coming from upstairs. It’s just me and Clay at home, so no chance I can continue my entrenchment on the sofa listening for the footsteps that indicate my wife will take care of this. I need to investigate.
Up I stand with a groan, take the two steps into the kitchen and promptly slam my head on the cabinet door that Clay has left open. We give him free access to a cabinet above the oven, which we stock mostly with a variety of chips. He never closes the door. After bouncing my head off it dozens of times, you’d think I would be looking out for it. You would think wrong. It is natural to look down at the steps into the kitchen as you climb them, and since the cabinet door is just a foot inside the kitchen and at eye level, well, wham-bam. This doesn’t improve my already crabby mood. Read the rest of this entry »
Quiet House
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life on January 24, 2011
My wife started it.
Attempting to get some conversation going with Clay on the keyboard he uses to communicate, she typed: “The house is quiet without your brother here.”
We had dropped Clay’s older brother back at college that afternoon after a five-week winter break.
“So true,” Clay typed back. “We are sad that he is back at school. Sorry that he is not here.”
It seemed like it would end there, but it didn’t. Read the rest of this entry »
Just A Suggestion
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Daily Life on January 19, 2011
Most weekday mornings, getting Clay out of bed in time to meet his 7 a.m. bus is like extracting your leg from a knee-deep mud puddle. It has to be done carefully, in stages and with much patience, or you’ll have a wet leg, a lost shoe and a kid who is still asleep.
My wife is the early riser (I do my best worrying late at night), so she faces the daily routine much more often, and it is not pretty. I’ll spare you the details, but it takes place in phases that begin with removing his comforter and enticing him to the sofa downstairs for a few more minutes rest to forcing his limp, dead-weight body into some clothes while he lulls in a state of stupefied, semi-consciousness. Much like someone watching Jersey Shore.
So, here’s the question. Why, on a day when we get the dead of night call that school is closed for snow, is Clay up and raring to go, unprompted, at 6 a.m.? Read the rest of this entry »
Going Social
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life on January 17, 2011
Friday morning, I showed Clay the article I wrote about him in the Philadelphia Inquirer, but, in all honesty, he was more interested in why his waffles weren’t out of the toaster oven, yet. Knowing that he is always listening and absorbing, though, we kept him updated throughout the weekend on the activity and comments.
The response to the article was overwhelming.
For a good portion of the weekend, the article was the second most shared item on the Inquirer’s Web site (and the most read in the opinion section). More than 300 people recommended it on Facebook. Traffic to this blog hit more than 10 times the typical number, and continued much heavier than normal throughout the weekend.
The article was touted on Twitter and even appeared in the Associated Press newsfeed. The number of Clay’s fans on Facebook more than doubled. And, most important, comments flooded in to the blog, the Inquirer, the Life with Clay Facebook page and via email. There was a wonderful, warm outpouring from parents, teachers, family, friends and even people who hadn’t before understood autism. Read the rest of this entry »
So Popular
Posted by Larry Blumenthal in Communicating, Daily Life on January 14, 2011
When I learned that a commentary I wrote about Clay, and how funny he is, was going to appear in the Philadelphia Inquirer, I realized there was something important I had neglected to do.
I have been chronicling a lot of intimate details of Clay’s life over the past 10 months. What he had to say the first time he typed. His message to his Mom on Mother’s Day. His first school dance. His 15th birthday. The loss of our dog. His first horseback ride. The first story he ever wrote. The amazing day when he appeared on a panel at Arcadia University.
I’ve written exactly 50 posts. Some made fun of his quirky behaviors like compulsively turning on lights or stripping our Christmas tree of its decorations. Others shared his anxiety over school or how much his camp counselors enjoyed their time with him.
Here’s what I didn’t do. In all that time, I never asked my son what he thought about having his life shared so publicly. Read the rest of this entry »
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Life With Clay 